After-Vacation Blues

I have the after-vacation blues. Don't think it's a real thing? It is. At least, the internet says it is, so it *must* be. This morning, sitting in a very tedious meeting, my mind began to wander to thoughts of "is this really what I'm supposed to be doing with my life?" Irrationally, I fantasized about quitting my job, selling my home and all my worldly possessions, and traveling somewhere (anywhere) with my boyfriend. In my mind, we are somewhere warm and I'm wearing a sundress and sandals. We meet interesting people, we write in cafes while sipping cool drinks, and climb mountains and swim in oceans. Jolted back into reality, my rational side reminds me that I really don't have it that bad. My job is interesting most days, there is the possibilty to move to a different work area when I'm bored, and I am paid well which affords me a comfortable life. "It's just the after-vacation blues", I tell myself.

Added to that is the fact that I haven't been eating very well, haven't been working out, didn't sleep very well last night and have a bunch of added hormones swimming through my bloodstream thanks to new birth control. This is all adding up to make me feel slightly more crazy than usual. Whenever I feel off these days, I try to attribute the feeling to concrete things that I can change and that sense of control seems to help immensly. Tonight I'm heading home after work to go for a short run and eat a nutritious dinner and that is sure to make me feel a bit better. I hope that's the case, I'll let you know tomorrow if it worked.

I came across a cover version of Bruce Johnston's (Beach Boys) "Tears in the Morning" and have had it running through my head all day. At least my life isn't depicted in these lyrics:

So you moved out up to Europe
You packed your warmth and you took your soul
Well I hope you do what you're damn sure of
A lonely bed here takes on the cold

Lose a wife, change my life, we're not together
A canceled future well it's hard on me
Gone, you're gone, are you gone forever?
Hope you love the baby I'm never gonna see